Here are tips for winning at L.C. Cage Fighters and Air Hockey in "GTA IV: The Ballad of Gay Tony." You must survive six rounds in cage fighting and win one game of air hockey for two requirements needed for 100% completion of the game. (List of requirements for 100% completion)
1. L.C. Cage Fighters. After you complete the mission "Momma's Boy" cage fighting becomes available. It's kind of GTA's version of Fight Club. There a six rounds for you to win to get the requirement and if you do, you also get the "Bear Fight" achievement. Each round contains three fighters. You must defeat all three fighters to win the round.
Some basic fighting techniques need to be mastered to prevail. First, target your opponent. You do that by pulling the left trigger and holding it. You'll notice a target on your opponent. Pressing the "B" button is a your basic punch. The "Y" button is an alternate punch. The "X" button is a kick. Now, kicks are not powerful but they keep your opponent at a distance. The "A" button is for dodging.
It's important to learn how to perform the "counter" move. It can be done whether your opponent is using his fist, bat or knife. First, you must have the opponent targeted with your left trigger. You cannot be too far away to do this move. Once he telegraphs his attack, press "A" and you will dodge. Then tap "B" or "Y." you get a cool punch combo that can finish him when you combine other attacks. If your opponent has a weapon, you disarm him and steal his weapon for you to use! So let's go over how to win six rounds.
In Rounds One and Two, it's pretty much button mashing. I don't recommend the trick of trying to hit your opponents as they reach the cage door to get to the ring because your punching leads you forward and if you step through the door, you will be disqualified.
The Health Trick. You'll notice after finishing a round that you get a small health bonus. It's not enough for the last three rounds. But there's a trick where you can have full health before each round. After you complete a round, you are given the option to continue fighting or to spectate. If you are low on health, choose spectate. Now you have to bet on a fight but after the fight is over, you are given the option of quitting or competing. If you choose to compete, you will start the next round where you left off with full health. With this tip, let's discuss the next four rounds where it gets more difficult.
In Round Three, you are introduced to guys with bats and knifes. Starting with the second fighter in this round, they wield weapons. The second fighter comes at you with a bat. The bat is powerful. You could try to punch your way out of this but that's difficult. Better to disarm him. As he is about to swing his bat, tap "A" and perform a counter move. Remember after you dodge to punch him. You get the bat from him. Now use the "B" and "Y" buttons to attack. The bat takes about two swings to down him. The third fighter in this Round has a knife. But the great thing about he bat is that you can attack him from a greater distance. Unfortunately, you lose the bat after each round.
Rounds Four and Five have the same pattern of opponents. The first guy you face has the bat. Disarm him with the counter move and take the bat to pummel him. The second guy is unarmed. With the bat, wail on him. The third fighter has a knife. Finish him off. Now, remember that after you finish a Round to use the above health trick, if you need to replenish your health.
The final and Sixth Round features three fighters with knifes. Perform a counter move and take the knife from the first fighter. Use the knife against him. You can use the knife against the other two. Remember, the "B" and "Y" buttons become attack buttons for the knife. Defeat these two and become the Liberty City Champion.
2. Air Hockey Tips. First, the XBOX controller is not made to play this type of mini-game. The sticks are awkward when trying to move your paddle. Often, you will knock the puck into your own goal.
So how do you win a game? Easy. Don't try to shoot the puck directly in your opponent's goal. Ricochet or bounce the puck off the sides of the arena into your opponent's goal. Use power shots to bounce them off. Your opponent is too slow to react to a ricochet shot.
The Cincinnati Bengals pounded the Cleveland Browns today by running the ball down their throats. That led to a 16-7 win. Former Chiefs RB Larry Johnson had one hundred and seven yards rushing for the Bengals, making signing the controversial runner as a back up for the injured Cedric Benson, a good move. The Bengals other back Bernard Scott also had a good day running the ball. It was clear that the Bengals wanted to run and play smash mouth football AFC North style.
It wasn't the prettiest of victories. Bengals QB Carson Palmer was hurried many times. The passing game was off. Cleveland Browns QB Brady Quinn was simply awful. That doesn't take anything away from the excellent play by the Bengals defense. But a win is a win.
Today's victory makes a complete sweep of AFC North opponents. The Bengals are 8-3 with five games left to go. The battle of Ohio is ours. Here are the highlights.
Happy Thanksgiving! Here's the classic Thanksgiving episode from "WKRP in Cincinnati." (Season One, 1978) In this show titled "Turkeys Away", bored station manager Arthur Carlson undertakes a crazy Thanksgiving promotion. Enjoy.
With the successful release of the Star Trek film and DVD, should Star Trek return to television? Absolutely. Look if they can bring back Futurama, and Family Guy, why not Star Trek? There's already a built in audience of fans and the recent movie has generated new ones. It should be very successful.
But shouldn't Trekkers worry about what happened with Star Trek: Enterprise? After all it was cancelled after four seasons. No. Here's why. That show was on a network, UPN, that was not available nationwide or suffered from being preempted. The city I live in, had it on a low powered TV station and the cable company servicing us, initially did not carry it. (Wikipedia article on availability of UPN, effect on Enterprise) The solution is to put the show on an established cable network. Networks such as SyFy (I hate the change from SciFi), TNT, or AMC would be good matches.
The next question is which series to bring back. Obviously, the film series is now in the original TV series timeline, so you don't want to do anything here. Or do you? Perhaps a different crew in Kirk's timeline? Probably not a good idea, since you want to keep the film series unique. However, J.J. Abrams blew up the timeline in his film, it's probably apparent that you must bring back Star Trek: Enterprise. I mean who knows if The Next Generation, Deep Space Nine or Voyager exist in the Abrams' timeline. For all we know, Captain Jean Luc Picard could turn out to be a vintner. On the other hand, the Star Trek: Enterprise timeline is unaffected. So, bring back Star Trek: Enterprise. (Crew pictured above.)
When the Bengals took a 14-0 lead against the woeful Oakland Raiders, you thought game over. Unfortunately, the Bengals went to sleep in the second half and the old adage "You don't let a bad team hang around" happened. Raiders QB Bruce Gradkowsski again beat the Bengals just like he did three years ago. When the Raiders scored the tying touchdown with less than two minutes to go, I thought we'll get the ball back and win it, "Cardiac Cats" style. Um, no. The old Bengals came back. Andre Caldwell took the kickoff and after running about twenty yards fumbled the ball. Raiders kick a field goal, 20-17. Game over. Still, the Bengals hold a one game lead as those Pittsburgh bums lost to the Kansas City Chiefs.
If you watched the Nov. 18, 2009 episode of "Modern Family", you saw at the end, an in memoriam card dedicated to comedy writer David Lloyd. The card read, "A little song, a little dance, a little seltzer down your pants." If you're older than forty, you know where that line comes from.
David Lloyd passed away on Nov. 10, 2009. He was a prolific comedy writer. He wrote for The Bob Newhart Show, Taxi, Cheers, Wings, Frasier and a little sitcom called, "The Mary Tyler Moore Show." His comedy will stand the test of time.
It's not easy being a comedy writer. Humor is a subjective matter. Trying to find what is funny cannot be measured by objective means. So when you hear the plot to the season 6 episode of Mary Tyler Moore called "Chuckles Bites the Dust", written by Lloyd, it's not going to sound funny. But here it is. Chuckles the Clown, who is the children's entertainer at the TV station WJM, gets killed while marching in the parade. Not funny. But wait, there's more. He gets killed while dressed as one of his on air characters, Peter the Peanut. A rogue elephant in the parade tried to shell him. Okay, dark but funny. This leads the group at WJM consisting of Lou, Murray and Sue Ann to crack jokes. Mary is appalled because somebody has died. All of this comes to a riotous conclusion at the funeral. The episode won an Emmy for LLoyd.
So it's fitting for Christopher Lloyd, David's son, and co-creator of "Modern Family" to put a card on the air with that expression. Since it comes from "Chuckles Bites the Dust." You see that was Chuckles the Clown's motto and at his funeral, the Reverend recites it. Somebody posted the entire episode on YouTube. Here it is.
To celebrate the DVD release of Star Trek (2009), I'm going to rate the all eleven films, starting with the worst and finishing with the best. First, let's get some introductory issues out of the way. I grade all the Star Trek films from excellent (A) to average (C). There are no bombs in the Star Trek movie library. Second, here are some notes to Bad Robot, who is developing the next Star Trek film. Stop making Wrath of Khan. I'm sick of seeing a plot with a bad guy seeking revenge. See Star Trek: Insurrection, Nemesis and the new film. Don't let actors develop the screenplays. See Star Trek V and Star Trek: Nemesis. Finally, could we have some space exploration? I'm not talking about a lot here. But the opening monologue talks about exploring strange new worlds, and seeking new life and civilizations. Now let's boldly go and rate the Star Trek films.
11. Star Trek V: The Final Frontier (1989) Spock's half brother steals the Enterprise to find God. What?! Directed and partly written by William Shatner, this silly movie is the worse of all the Trek films. In it, you have Kirk, Spock and McCoy sitting around the campfire singing, "Row, row, row your boat." You've got Uhura doing a fan dance. Scotty knocks himself out walking into a support beam. Ha. Grade: C.
10. Star Trek: The Motion Picture (1979) A massive alien cloud called V'ger heads to earth with possible harmful intentions. The Enterprise must stop it. It's the return of Star Trek after the classic series was cancelled. You had a film helmed by Robert Wise, of The Day the Earth Stood Still and the Sound of Music. What could go wrong? Well, the film is similar to the second season episode "The Changeling." There is also a lack of dramatic tension because the cloud is well, nebulous. The saving grace is Jerry Goldsmith's majestic score. The main theme is so good, it's used again as the theme for the Next Generation television show. Grade: B Minus.
9. Star Trek: Insurrection (1998) Capt. Picard (Patrick Stewart) must stop the Federation from exploiting a planet inhabited by a bunch of New Age aliens. We are introduced to F. Murray Abraham's Ru'afo who also wants to exploit the planet and also seek revenge on the planet. See Khan.
This movie feels like an elongated episode of the Star Trek: Next Generation. The aliens look like humans probably to allow for a romance between Picard and the lead female alien, Donna Murphy. Ru'afo also has a disgusting skin stretching procedure to keep feeling young. What's the point here? I'm sure Abraham was saying to himself, "Wasn't I in Amadeus?"Writers Rick Berman and Micheal Piller who come from the TV side of Star Trek put together a story that feels like an inside joke. Still, it's well made and somewhat entertaining. Grade: B Minus.
8. Star Trek: Generations (1994) Picard must stop an addicted scientist from destroying stars to move an energy ribbon which has trapped Captain James T. Kirk. (William Shatner) Look, rather than having Kirk stuck in an energy ribbon why didn't the writers just have a way for him to travel into the future? And how do you travel from the ribbon into the real universe? Tap your magic slippers? Additionally, there's no need to kill off Kirk. This movie is saved by great action set pieces, humor and Dennis McCarthy's dynamic score. Grade: B.
7. Star Trek: Nemesis(2002) Picard's clone seeks to kill Picard and destroy life on earth. You see the clone was created as a replacement and spy for Romulus. Once the plan was abandoned, the clone was exiled on Remus, a planet of mines to die. If this sounds all like Khan, it should. There's even a heroic sacrifice and death. Data. Of course, the story allows for a resurrection of sorts like Star Trek 3 because at the end of the movie there exists a prototype of Data. Excellent action sequences but we've seen this before. There's a story assist by Brent Spiner. I hope the future producers of Star Trek will ignore story ideas by the stars because having Data sing "Blue Skies" is goofy. Okay, use them only if they're good and original Grade: B.
6. Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country (1991) Kirk and McCoy on a diplomatic mission are framed for the assassination of the Klingon leader. This film is the swan song for the original crew. It does them justice. There's action. Intrigue. Who framed Kirk and McCoy and why? There's humor. You got to give it to Shatner for some of the jokes at his expense. And there is a great message, about letting go of hate and changing for the better. Grade: B.
5. Star Trek III: The Search for Spock (1984) Remember Star Trek II where Spock dies? Well, they left a way to resurrect him. You see the Enterprise fired Spock's torpedo towards the Genesis planet which creates life from matter. Meanwhile McCoy has Spock's katra, his living soul inside of him. To save Spock, Kirk steals the Enterprise and goes to Genesis to find Spock. Then they must go to Vulcan so the soul and body can be united. Whew. Trust me you'll like it. Leonard Nimoy directs this solemn and enjoyable journey of the crew of the Enterprise. Grade: B.
4. Star Trek (2009) Romulan Nero goes through a black hole trying to enact revenge on Spock and goes back in time changing the timeline. The film then traces how the crew of the Enterprise got together. We see young Kirk and Spock before Starfleet Academy. But the timeline has been significantly changed as evidenced by the destruction of Vulcan, one of founding planets of the Federation. However, some of the forty years of Star Trek canon survive. Update: What has happened is that Nero's appearance in the past has caused a second or alternte reality. It is in essence a parallel universe. So, Trek canon has survived but now Bad Robot can alter old canon in this new universe.
The good. Director J. J. Abrams has crafted a well made and entertaining film. The special effects are spectacular. The cast does a great job. There's some very funny moments. The movie is going to get young people to look at Star Trek.
The bad. This is a shallow film. Kirk (Chris Pine) comes off as an insolent jerk. The humor at times comes at the expense of Star Trek canon. See Kirk munch on an apple while defeating the Kobayashi Maru test. There's some strange logic too. See Chekov run to the transporter room to teleport Kirk and Sulu as they are falling to their death. Okay, by the time he gets there, Kirk and Sulu should be road kill. And altering the timeline is a cheap way to reboot the series. There was no need to do this. There's a galaxy of stories that could be told within the existing timeline. Why destroy Vulcan? That leaves the Federation with the alien pig race Tellarites and Andorians to protect us from the Klingons and Romulans. Heaven help us.
(From "Journey to Babel" TOS, the alien pig race, Tellarites. These guys against the Klingons, I smell bacon.)
Abrams is more of a Star Wars fan. (Entertainment Weekly, Oct. 24, 2008, pg. 29) But Star Trek is not Star Wars. Star Trek stands for intelligent science fiction not fantasy. Heck, the series had science advisors. Yet, this movie at times felt more like Star Wars not Star Trek.
One quick note on the soundtrack. Micahel Giacchino is wonderful composer. But on this one, he struck out. The main theme is in a minor key. Now, I like minor key melodies too, but for Star Trek? The dour theme could be Spock's song but the main theme of any Star Trek movie must inspire. And by inspire, I mean make one yearn to explore the stars. Thankfully, he adds Alexander Courage's optimistic original TV theme for the end.
Does all that criticism mean I hate this film? No. It's still a lot of fun. I just want the next one to be smarter. Grade: B.
(Data and the Borg Queen from Star Trek: First Contact.)
3. Star Trek: First Contact (1996) Bad ass Next Generation villains, the Borg, go back in time to stop man's first warp flight to alter the future so they can more easily assimilate mankind. The twist? It's Picard who has revenge issues since he was previously assimilated in the TV episode, "The Best of Both Worlds."
This is the best of the Next Generation films. What can I say about the Borg? They exist to assimilate you into their culture. They phyiscally change you into a hideous cyborg creature. You lose your individuality. And who can forget their line, "Resistance is futile." But as scary and evil as they seem, there's a twisted logic behind it. They seek perfection by absorbing other races. This is what I call a grade A villain. There's great acting by Patrick Stewart as he wrestles with his desire for revenge. Action sequences are tense as the Borg try to assimilate the Enterprise. There's also a great Star Trek moment as mankind makes first contact with an alien race. Grade: A.
2. Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan (1982) Khan (Ricardo Montalban), who was exiled on a planet in the original TV episode Space Seed, seeks revenge on Captain Kirk.
This movie revitalizes Star Trek. Ironically, it does so as it deals with the ideal of aging. Kirk laments that he is getting older. Montalban is a tour de force as Khan. His portrayal as a superhuman who loses his wife after being abandoned is sympathetic. Leonard Nimoy's performance as Spock brims with wisdom of a man who has learned much from life.
Produced and co-written by Harve Bennett, who undertook the job by watching the complete original series. He got it. He understood Star Trek. With direction by Nicholas Meyer, they made a great film. The battle in the Mutara Nebula is tense and exciting. There's Trek humor and sacrifice. The naval score by Jack Horner (who would write the score for Titianic) is inspiring. The grade is A.
1. Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home (1986) An alien probe wrecks havoc on earth while searching for extinct humpback whales forcing the crew of the Enterprise to go back to the year of 1986 to bring some whales into the future. Trust me, when you see this movie, you'll love it.
So, why is this film without space battles, number one? Here's why. After two very serious movies, they decided to do a little comedy. And it works. The movie is actually a fish out of water story. The crew of the Enterprise turn in funny performances as they try to adapt to twentieth century earth. It also has a message as does all great Star Trek stories do. Ecology. Save the whales to save the future. This is in harmony with the TV show's sixties roots and is in tune with Star Trek creator Gene Roddenberry's vision. Of course, it's unknown if a giant alien probe will come to the planet in the twenty third century but the metaphor is what this film is about. Save the planet's ecology to save the future. A hilarious, and fun film. Grade is A+.
Sarah Palin described bloggers as people in their pajamas sitting in their mother's basement. Well, Sarah I sometimes blog in my pajamas. Your comment has inspired a great name for this blog. Thanks, Sarah.
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